@gsuberland They're not stuck on, they're on until you manually turn them off.
There are unavoidable tradeoffs in every case especially in the "I want to switch a wall receptacle with the switch" use case.
@gsuberland When you deploy the system, you didn't know that the switch controlled that receptacle.
The receptacle has to be controlled by a relay somewhere, and that relay has to be independent of the switch (unless you want to lock yourself into a fixed "this switch - that relay" scenario that eliminates most of the benefits of smarts).
The only sane choice is for the relay to be normally closed so the receptacle doesn't go permanently-off on failure. Which means the failure mode *has* to be always-on.
@azonenberg what I'm saying is you have the switch points carry mains just like you would in a regular house, except the switch point contains a relay internally that lets you toggle the lighting state with a smart controller (SPDT switch wired to an SPDT latching relay in series within the switch point itself). if the controller fails, the light switch continues to work 100% as normal. no lighting state changes occur.
@gsuberland This prevents you from remapping the switch to control something else instead of / in addition to the hardwired load (like an overhead light and a table lamp).
That lamp has to fail on or off if the electronics go haywire.
@azonenberg oh I have no interest in that kind of stuff, I just want a simple switch
@azonenberg I will happily give up more advanced control features to keep the basics simple and hazard/hassle free